Inadequate, But Not Alone

Photo Credit: Stuart Miles at

Today, I feel inadequate. Not at all qualified to encourage parents to fight the isolation that threatens to engulf them. Not at all worthy to remind them they are not alone. Not at all an example of how to ask for help from others. Because when events in my life took a difficult turn recently, I ignored my own advice. I rationalized my decision to isolate in numerous ways. It's no big … [Read more...]

Does Guilt Lace Your Dreams?

Guilt feelings plague many special needs parents. Guilt that we are not doing enough, guilt when we are too tired to do one more therapy session and pick up a book instead. Even deeper, fear that we caused our kid's disability. Irrational, out of our hands. But real. I would often have "guilt-flashbacks" during the first two years of Calvin's life. I wrote about them to survive, to process, to … [Read more...]

Are You The Dead Sea or The River Jordan?

Photo image courtesy of Kim Briers via

Raising a child with special needs can be exhausting.  You won't find anyone in our circle of parenthood disagreeing with that.  We can easily empathize with the mother who is discouraged and worn down, or the frustrated father who feels he can't do enough for his family.  We knowingly nod when we read articles admonishing us to engage in better self-care. However, I would also say that we … [Read more...]

When Life Gets Tough(er)

When Life Gets Hard(er)

Life as we knew it was about to change – again. Along with our “special needs” young adult son and two school aged daughters, we began a series of challenging adjustments when Joe’s mom joined our household. Recovering from a two month hospitalization and nursing home rehabilitation stay, she unpacked her few and simple belongings along with the sad realization that her vascular … [Read more...]

Challenging Waves: A Surfer Who Understands Himself Better after Getting an Aspergers Diagnosis

Challenging Waves: A Surfer Who Understands Himself Better after Getting an Aspergers Diagnosis

“It’s not what we accomplish in life that matters most but what we overcome.” Jill’s motherly instincts sensed that Clay was unique and different from his older brother, Shane. When Jill tenderly nursed Clay he would twirl her hair. At seven months Clay abruptly quit nursing without any weaning. As a four-year-old Clay would line seashells in a ridge pattern along the beach. When Clay was five, … [Read more...]

Let Him Carry You

photo (3)

Isaiah 46:4 I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.   I have been going non-stop for years with my family, my job, and all my responsibilities. Are you a parent who works all day (sometimes several jobs) and then has to come home to your family and help them, clean up the house, pay the bills, feed the pets, get … [Read more...]