Special Needs Parenting

Finding Faith And Friendship On The Special Needs Journey

  • Facebook
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Home
  • Our Mission
  • Our Writers
  • Resources
  • Special Needs Parents Appreciation Month

But . . . Why?

July 26, 2013 by Kelly Langston

But-Why– Written by Colleen Swindoll Thompson

One of the first questions my children asked was, “Why?” It came at unwanted bedtimes, unexpected mealtimes, undesired moments of discipline, and unforgettable experiences of sacrifice and forgiveness.

A wonderful innocence surrounds the question of “Why?” I don’t think we ever outgrow that basic question… at least, we don’t until we settle one of life’s greatest realities: We are human, gravely broken in our ability to understand and comprehend God’s sovereign covering in our lives.

My father wrote an article titled “Asking Why,” written about suffering.

Of all questions, this is the most searching, the most tormenting. It accompanies every tragedy [every untimely disease; every abrupt, unexplainable handicap; every premature death]. It falls from the lips of the mother who delivers a stillborn [… the parent who hears that dreaded diagnosis, “It’s leukemia”] … the wife who learns of her husband’s tragic death…  the child who is told, “Daddy won’t be coming home anymore”…  the struggling father of five who loses his job… the close friend of one who commits suicide… 

Consider Job …  imagine his feelings!

“You’ve lost your livestock, they’ve been stolen. Your sheep and camels were also destroyed. Your employees were murdered, Job. Oh, one more thing—your children were crushed in a freak windstorm… they are dead, my friend, all ten of them.”¹

Most of us have heard about Scripture’s suffering pilgrim, Job. Most of us easily skip to the happy ending—Job’s blessings—often forgetting what happened in the book of Job before matters were settled. The core issue Job faced is no different than what you and I must face in our lives when pain and suffering enter our otherwise well-planned paths. Job prompts us to ask a crucial question: Am I willing to release what I wished for in order to embrace what God has allowed? If the answer were easy, Job’s story wouldn’t be a big deal. But it is a huge deal because suffering is pervasive and painful, and it goes against what we want or expect.

I don’t tire of listening to others as they fight to make sense of their suffering. God continues to show His mercy upon me as I also fall sometimes into the “why” question. God makes much room for those wrestling in these deep and dark matters. In addition, I’ve learned the ultimate question is never “Why?” but “For what purpose?” We need to embrace that pivotal perspective… Lord, for what purpose have you placed these trials in my life? Remember, He won’t be unloving or unkind, and seeking His purpose provides great insight and the opportunity for spiritual growth.

Today, you may be enduring circumstances that feel anything but loving—they may be tormenting, horrifying, grueling, and exhausting. Fallen human nature causes us to slip into the “whys” of wondering, but it’s far more healing to seek God’s purposes. He doesn’t waste a moment of our lives, and His ways are beyond our understanding. I encourage you to replace the “why” question with the “for what purpose” question. For today, what area of your life are you willing to release?

Like my kids, when they practiced doing what was right, the issue of “Why?” settled; and the combat was replaced by grand contentment.

 -by Colleen Swindoll Thompson

1. Taken from Charles R. Swindoll, The Finishing Touch: Becoming God’s Masterpiece (Dallas: Word, 1994), 170-71.
The following two tabs change content below.
  • Bio
  • Latest Posts
My Twitter profileMy Facebook profileMy Google+ profileMy LinkedIn profileMy Pinterest profileMy YouTube channel

Kelly Langston

Kelly believes that each day should include a healthy dose of laughter. Author of Autism's Hidden Blessings, she is a contributing writer for Believe.com and Not Alone, an online community for special needs parents. Kelly’s articles have appeared in P31 Magazine of Proverbs 31 Ministries and focus on her continual hunt to discover God’s fingerprint in every gift that life brings. Read more at http://www.kellylangston.com.
My Twitter profileMy Facebook profileMy Google+ profileMy LinkedIn profileMy Pinterest profileMy YouTube channel

Latest posts by Kelly Langston (see all)

  • Have a Merry, Messy Christmas! - December 22, 2015
  • Gratitude: God’s Secret Pathway to Protection - November 24, 2015
  • Will It Be All Right? (And What if You Aren’t Sure?) - October 28, 2015

Share this post with friends:

  • Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Share on Pinterest (Opens in new window) Pinterest
  • Email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading…

Filed Under: Colleen Swindoll-Thompson, Grief, Living Life Daily, Patience, Peace Tagged With: Colleen Swindoll-Thompson, Insight For Living, not alone, parenting, parenting special needs, special needs, special needs parenting

Join Us On Facebook!

Join Us On Facebook!

Top Posts & Pages

  • Two things I wish I knew at the time of my child's diagnosis
    Two things I wish I knew at the time of my child's diagnosis
  • What If She Lives With Us Forever?
    What If She Lives With Us Forever?
  • Taking Autism Awareness to My Son's School
    Taking Autism Awareness to My Son's School
  • Blessings in Disguise
    Blessings in Disguise
  • We've Moved to KeyMinistry.org
    We've Moved to KeyMinistry.org
  • Debbie Kay
    Debbie Kay

Recent Pins

Visit Not Alone's profile on Pinterest.

Copyright © 2026 Not Alone · Built on the Genesis Framework · Site by Design by Insight

Copyright © 2026 · Not Alone on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in

%d