Maybe those words have never fallen out of your mouth, but they have mine! I hate to admit it, but there are days when I’ve just had enough.
A friend whose life is similar to mine has confessed to me (as I have to her) that we have said these words not only in our heads but they’ve come out of our mouths. And sometimes they have been with anger, exhaust, and a few other emotions!
A number of years ago my friend’s husband actually called me to tell me his wife had just “had it” and left. He said she was going away for a few days. I suggested we let her get on the road, cry for a while, get out all the frustration, and (because I’d been there before) let her gather her senses and figure out when she needs to come back. I told him I’d call her just before I went to bed and if she wasn’t on her way home, I’d have some serious (caring/understanding) conversation with her.
This precious “younger woman” in my life and I have had many conversations sharing our frustrations as well as joys. I’ve sat with her on a few occasions in hospitals, on the phone, at our home and when we get to have lunch…over a nice meal. She’s one of a handful of people I’ve given permission to call me at any time day or night if there is a problem. And she has. I love that she does, and how wonderful it is that I’ve been available when she’s needed me. We are there for each other. We “get” the life we’ve been given, so we know we can say anything to each other and we don’t share it beyond each other (with the exception that she has given permission for me to share this story with you!)
So, when neither her husband nor I had heard from her, I made the call. She didn’t answer but texted, “I’m almost home. I’ll call you tomorrow.”
The next day sounded something like this:
Friend, “Hi Cindi. I just needed to get away! I came to my senses and new I needed to come home. I knew I couldn’t leave them!”
ME, “So, where were you going to go?”
Friend, “To the happiest place on earth: Disney!”
WE BOTH BROKE INTO LAUGHTER!
Me, “So why didn’t you invite ME?!??!”
Life is hard. Having good friends helps us get through these challenges. It doesn’t actually matter what the challenges are, because we know we all have them, and those of us in the special needs community know how challenging and even frustrating that 24/7 care can be.
I have only have one thought of wisdom for you as you read this, and that is to find someone who is a little down the road in this journey of life and ask him or her for help. And then, when you get to a place you can help another, be there for someone younger. Honestly, the journey is so much better with someone at your side. So when they’ve “had it” you can help get them through that time….until the time when it’s your turn!