Daily Bread: parenting kids with special needs
“How do you deal with the possibility that you could be a ‘forever mom,’ that is, that Polly and Evangeline may never leave home?” a young mom asks me after I finish sharing our family’s story with her MOPS group.
I get this question often. It makes sense. I have children with special needs. We are unsure of the future. Will they live on their own or at home? What will it be like to care for adults with disabilities as opposed to young children?
I think about how to answer. An image surfaces in my mind of Polly, my third daughter who was born with Down syndrome and Moyamoya, her eyes closed, her hands folded in prayer.
Give us this day our daily bread.
My husband Sergei initiated a morning habit about a year ago. Every morning we try to recite The Lord’s Prayer as a family before anyone leaves the house.
There are a lot of days we don’t get to it, but enough that when we do, Polly repeats the prayer almost word for word with her older sisters.
I hear her little voice.
Give us this day our daily bread.
For those parenting kids with special needs, for any parent for that matter, that’s my answer.
Give us this day our daily bread.
There is no way I can parent today with out the daily strength God graciously gives.
There is no way to think about the future without worrying, and thus usurping what little energy and focus I have for this day.
The only way to parent is day by day.
So I answer the young mom’s question.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And I rest in the fact that tomorrow, regardless of what is going on in life, or how or who I am parenting, there will be just enough manna for this tired mama as well.
Day by day. That’s how I parent. By God’s grace. Day by day. That’s how the future questions will resolve.
Give us this day our daily bread.
Thank you for this post. I love the simplicity and the freedom this gives. We just put one foot in front of the other and walk with God as he enables to tackles each step.
As a mom of 2 special-needs kids, I appreciate this very much. God’s compassions are new every morning — that’s how we do it. I love the “daily bread” image; it will stay with me, I know. Thanks for sharing.
Thanks for your comment, Jeannie.
Thanks, Gillian. My son Joel, who has autism, is 28 years old. There were many times when he was young that I wondered how I would get through the next day, much less the next 20 years! But by God’s grace, day by day, we made it through the hard days and found lots and lots of joy on the other days. Joel recites the Lord’s Prayer every night at bedtime, reminding me to be thankful for the daily bread that has sustained us thus far, and will sustain us forever. Today, we can’t imagine life without our son!
Thanks for sharing a little bit about Joel with us. It encourages me!
Lovely. Yes, that is all any parent can do, but especially those of us with children who have special needs.
You are so right. Thanks Sue.