It’s hard not to feel as if the world’s on the brink of collapse these days. Five minutes of the evening news is enough to warrant Zantac. It doesn’t help that I write on policy (among other things), and so I am often online digesting politics with my morning cereal. Guess what? Politics doesn’t naturally lead to gratitude. Who knew. Right now, people seem inscrutable, rhetoric is flammable, … [Read more...]
Known by God
"Finding God is not hard. Letting God find us...is hard" (Nick Wagner, Presence: An International Journal of Spiritual Direction, Vol. 22 No. 3). As the mother of a 31-year-old son with autism, I long to be known by God. I often need comfort, discernment, direction, or just a simple "hug" from the Holy Spirit. I need to know that God loves me, even with all of my shortcomings. Lectio Divina, … [Read more...]
Different Just Like Me
It was a Thursday night, and I was sitting on the couch after dinner, watching the news. Noah slipped in from the kitchen and sat down next to me. A few times daily, Noah sidles in to check on me. While his ninja-level lurking usually scares me out of my skin (because, as he says, “Screaming makes my brain all fluttery”), Noah likes to periodically sense my mood and see what I’m doing. Noah … [Read more...]
The Goodbye Salute: Noah Transitions to Middle School
In the gymnasium at North Bend Elementary, a smallish school in a mostly agrarian county in northeast Maryland, we parents sat packed together in tight rows. We were prepping for a transition. In the front of the gym, on the floor, were rows of children from kindergarten through fourth grade. They were present as witnesses to this celebration of the fifth graders. Today, the school would laud … [Read more...]
Plagues of People, Safety in Numbers
Children on the autism spectrum usually fall in one of two camps when it comes to their feelings about crowds: crowds are either an audience or a plague. For Jesse, crowds are an audience. He loves to mug, and show off, and recite what he knows about things of no interest to the listener. For Noah, crowds are a plague. This makes it a challenge to plan a wedding when both boys are also a part … [Read more...]
When the Disability’s Not So “Bad”
I feel guilty about a very strange thing. Not about something I’ve done, but about something I was given. Today, I want to hold my hand up and shield people from paying attention to this part of my life; here, in this particular community of parents who struggle daily with special needs, and never-ending vigilance. A few codes in our neurologist’s office indicate I’ve every right to be among you … [Read more...]