I’ve had conversations with three separate people this week regarding the way our perception of events either clouds our Kingdom vision, or clarifies it. I can’t think of a better word picture for this than washing windows. My husband and I live in the country, where farmers plow and plant and harvest. We also live on the highest point of the county, where the wind blows—a lot! Windows get … [Read more...]
Emily and Max Went Back to Church, and Found Extra Family
Something happened at church. Or perhaps what you need to know is, what didn’t happen. I pulled up to the church and Max bounced out of the car swinging his favorite vacuum. Several people were unsuspectingly milling around by the front door, exchanging greetings. “Watch out for the people!” I yelled behind Max as I watched his 8-pound Oreck swing like a ten ton wrecking ball. I fully expected … [Read more...]
When the Disability’s Not So “Bad”
I feel guilty about a very strange thing. Not about something I’ve done, but about something I was given. Today, I want to hold my hand up and shield people from paying attention to this part of my life; here, in this particular community of parents who struggle daily with special needs, and never-ending vigilance. A few codes in our neurologist’s office indicate I’ve every right to be among you … [Read more...]
Saving Up the Hard Stuff
“So much will change,” they say, pointing to your swollen belly, nearly giddy with the kind of knowledge that only experience supplies. “Your life will never be the same!” I know, you think smugly. I’ve heard it, I’ve read it, it’s the mantra you mothers all repeat. But they’re right, of course. While things will change, many of those changes are expected: those that arise from the training of … [Read more...]
She Calls Me Mama
She calls me what her brothers don’t. Because they are boys, most likely, or perhaps because they are impatient and "MOM!" hollered from somewhere else is easier to get out of their mouths. Loudly. Grace is walking up the stairs, calling my name before she reaches the top. But it’s not the “Mom!” of Noah’s tween insistence. It’s her calling, “Mama?” It is sweet and gentle. And it lasts only … [Read more...]
Will It Be All Right? (And What if You Aren’t Sure?)
I know you’re weary. I feel it, too. I feel it deep in my bones before my feet hit the floor in the still-dark hours of the early morning. I feel it... weariness. I'm so tired of a broken world full of darkness unspeakable. Tired of shoulders hunched from the heavy load of caring for family. My cheeks are red from the frustration of mothering a child with special needs and a teen struggling … [Read more...]