“What’s your New Year’s Resolution?” It’s that time again. Everyone is asking. Some of us ignore them. Some of us have different ones every year. And some of us, who shall remain nameless, have the same one lose weight year after year.
In the last couple of years we really struggled with some behavior issues with our son, Evan. We had no choice but to become quite open about them. People were starting to notice we weren’t coming to the parties, church, Target, or even leaving the house much at all. Our behavior as a family had to change dramatically. In that openness, we asked for prayer. We began praying. It was really a constant prayer every day and night pleading for God to change Evan’s demeanor. We prayed, searched, asked, and let others know of our situation.
It has been a slow change, but Evan has come to a place of living without so much disagreement, to put it mildly. What was the cure, you ask? The magic pill? I have to wonder if opening our need up to others was part of the answer. By asking others to go before God in prayer on our behalf we give God the opportunity to show his glory. John Piper said it well here. He reminds us our whole purpose is to draw attention to God. 1 Peter 2:9-10 says it so well: “… that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light … once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy.” What better way to tell people about this than how God has worked in our trials. And we can’t do that if we keep quiet about our trials.
God has shown us many different ways to handle Evan’s situation. He has not only taught me about handling Evan but other things along the way, as well. Things about waiting, perseverance, patience and God’s timing not mine. It wasn’t as if he magically granted a wish of immediate healing. But Evan is a different guy than he was a year and a half ago. And for that, I am praising God.
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know the testing of your faith produces perseverance.” James 1:2-3
Trials like these are so difficult to accept; to know that God is doing something in them. And if we keep these trials to ourselves, which I so badly want to do, how can we give God the glory in them? Trials aren’t fun, no sir-ree. But seeing God work his miracles and coming through on the other side, that’s what we all want to be a part of, right?
So this year, what’s your New Year’s Resolution? Maybe we should be sharing it, telling it, asking others to please pray about it. They are usually our biggest personal, private trials. Don’t we really want to tell others about how God worked in that situation? So here is one of my many hangups: sugar. I loooove sugar. Sugar cookies, candies, bite-size cupcakes, macaroons, ICED Sugar Cookies! Need I go on? But sugar does not love me. Or my hips, tummy, wiggly-wavy underarms. You get the picture. I am opening up my secret of love for sugar and the need to get rid of it this year. Will you join me in praying for this? It sounds a little silly or trivial in the face of some of our lives, but boy am I tired of it and the hold it has on me.
“Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” Hebrews 4:16
What’s your New Year’s Resolution? Is it like mine, a typical one? Or is your’s different, something deeper? Let God show his glory in it by letting someone in to pray for you. It may not happen over night. It may take years of ebb and flow. Remember, God is working for us in our trials. It’s not always fun in the valley, but wait for it. Wait for it …
“Blessed is the one who preservers under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.” James 1:12
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please pray for me , I need to find the right people to help with my son with his studies currently in grade five but doing grade one to two work. And yes it can be tricky sharing your child’s need with anyone but I know I can do this with God through prayers
Ana, I will pray right now. I know EXACTLY how tense it can be in the school setting. I want the very best for my children and I want everyone to see their need to have the very best, to not just ‘get by’ from year to year. I will pray for your son to have all the right supports put in place to give him the best chance at learning to his greatest potential. You are his greatest advocate. I will also pray for support to surround you in both the schooling and for Godly guidance.
You brought tears to my eyes when I read your reply. You also gave me a sense of not been alone praying for my son. Thank you and God bless you
totally brilliant! thank you! indeed we are not alone. my life sounds like yours….thanks for the encouragement. praying to give God ALL the glory in my trials.
Thank you for such a compliment, Julie. Isn’t it difficult to not just secretly pray the trial away? My prayer will be for God’s glory to shine in your life!
Thank you.
Kind words. In my home.
worn mom of 10 , 5 still at home full time but still helping w/ care of 2 close disabled relatives
Oh, heavens, Monique. I know I would be worn too. My prayer will be not just for your physical strength but knowing you have the word of Christ to lean on too.
You make some excellent points. My concern in my own parenting struggles (a little different than personal struggles) is that I’m not only sharing my story but my child’s. I do have some close friends and family that stand along side me in the biggest trials. But I don’t share widely, simply because it’s not really mine to share. As a parent, yes, I need the support. But I’m worried that if I share my child’s struggles with others, I open him up to vulnerability by sharing something that should be his decision to share rather than mine. Some people choose to use their struggles to help others, and I hope one day my son is strong enough to do that. But some people never reach that point. Instead, they are embarrassed or ashamed (even though they’re not to blame) or simply more private people. As a parent, I feel it is my responsibility to respect my child’s choice, his privacy, and protect him by allowing him to decide what to share openly about his situation, rather than making that decision for him.
I think we each could never presume to make decisions for another’s family, Jessica. Especially in this digital world where we don’t really know each other. We all have to go to God with our specific situation and ask for his guidance. It sounds like you have surrounded yourself with friends and family for support. The only thing I would add is Godly counsel, and maybe they are already within that network. You have to do what is right for your family according to God’s will. And he will always find a way to bring glory to himself within that setting.
Wise counsel. Thanks. God bless.
Thank you for your faithful reading & comments, Denie! You are so kind.