It’s the life of a parent raising a child with special needs — endless waiting. After we wait in great expectation for the arrival of our child, whether by birth or adoption, we begin the journey trying to figure out why something doesn’t seem quite right. It can be glaringly apparent or something just subtly “off” that we notice.
We wait for a diagnosis…
Once we have some idea what we are dealing with, the specialists, treatments and therapies begin.
We wait for appointments…
Extended family and friends come to know that our child has a diagnosis. Some are supportive, but some add to our pain.
We wait for acceptance and love from others…
Over the years, we invest in our child and do everything to help them succeed. We smile at the joy they bring to the world. Yet, often their physical or emotional challenges break our heart. We would much rather be the one to suffer than them.
We often wait for a cure…
These are only the tip of the iceberg. We parents spend such an inordinate amount of time in a holding pattern, waiting for test results, waiting for financial assistance, waiting for churches to welcome and include us, waiting for life to stabilize or normalize, waiting for someone to be a friend to our remarkable child.
In one translation, the Bible uses the word “wait” over 120 times. Yet, not all waiting is created equal. For example, laying in wait holds the intention to harm others, which is not equal to the patience of persevering until we are rescued.
Perhaps God allows parents of kids with diagnoses a distinct spiritual advantage through all of our waiting. Sound crazy? Think of it as a workout or boot camp, endurance training. After all, Paul tells us in his letter to the Roman church, “We can rejoice , too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they helps us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.” (Chapter 5, vv 3-5, NLT) With our eyes focused in the right place, we parents raising challenged children certainly become experts in persistence. Possessing such skill give us value as instructors to suffering people far beyond the scope of special needs.
Surviving the character stretching of dwelling in delay or expectation may develop a strong, gritty countenance, but if we are not waiting on the Lord, we wait in vain. You may never live to see a cure for your child. Treatments always have the potential to disappoint. This world is never short of people with unkind words or alienation of those who are different from them. Government programs and laws fail to meet all of our needs. Yet, we are reminded in Psalm 25:3, “No one who hopes in you will ever be put to shame…” (NIV).
Dig deep into God’s word. He has much encouragement for you as you endure, sometimes with great weariness. He will fill you up for the journey, just as he did his very own Son.
The following meditation is a small bit of comfort for you when they waiting gets long…
photo image courtesy of Free Digital Images.net
Barbara Dittrich
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