A few Sundays ago, I listened to the parable of the ten bridesmaids as it was read in mass. The message to “be prepared” came through loud and clear. On that particular Sunday, though, this gospel reading took on a very different twist. You see, three days prior, my father had passed away at the age of 100. He had lived at home rather independently (with some daily support) up until 12 days … [Read more...]
It’s Okay
“It’s okay.” These were the words a godly counselor shared with me one day when I was distraught over my child’s diagnosis of autism. Clifford was a friend of the family and a marriage and family therapist who had come to town for a visit. My first thoughts were to scream at him, “No, it’s not okay. How can you say it’s okay?” But he was a wise older gentleman so I unraveled my emotional … [Read more...]
Love in the Age of Worry
Love in the Age of Worry “He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection.” – Psalm 91:4 NLT I’d planned to write about Jesse this week. I'd planned a piece about theoretical fear. Jesse is my youngest child, and has autism spectrum disorder (ASD) and ADHD. As He is wont to do, God changed the plan. On a Tuesday … [Read more...]
Wholeness Does Not Mean Perfection: It Means Embracing Brokenness
I can’t tell you how many times, over my 32 year journey with autism, I have returned to this quote for inspiration: On July 4, 1999, a twenty-minute maelstrom of hurricane force winds took down twenty million trees across the Boundary Waters. A month later, when I made my annual pilgrimage up north, I was heartbroken by the ruin and wondered whether I wanted to return. And yet on each visit … [Read more...]
As Long as I Can Walk, I’m Going to Walk
"What I remember about your dad," my cousin said at a recent family reunion, "is that he was a big kid. He was always in the thick of things, playing with us. He never sat still." My cousin's lip trembled a bit, and tears came to his eyes. My eyes also went damp, as they always do when my older cousins describe their Uncle Harlan's antics. Though their memories bring me to tears, I crave their … [Read more...]
Don’t Ever, Ever Think You Walk Alone
I remember my father once telling me, “It’s dangerous to live.” What he meant was that life is full of risks and dangers and that if we are constantly worried about those risks and dangers, then we’re not really living. I’ve often recounted this quote whenever a therapist overplayed the safety card with Ben – you know, when they say it wouldn’t be safe to transfer Ben into his walker or … [Read more...]