“I know of other mothers who have children with disabilities, and right away they loved them and decided to fight for them. That isn’t my story.” –Gillian Marchenko Sun Shine Down, Gillian Marchenko’s memoir, is an honest and poignant tale of a mother’s life shattered by Down syndrome. In her memoir, Gillian recounts the birth of Polly, her third daughter by emergency c-section, in the … [Read more...]
Special needs adoption … four years in
Special needs adoption "Ma ma ma ma ma," I place my palm flat against my face and pat my lips, take my daughter Evangeline's soft, doughy hand in mine, and do it with her. "Ma ma ma ma ma." She likes it. So I do it again. Evangeline is non-verbal, but she will mumble sounds from time to time. I yearn to hear her say "ma." We lie in her bed at dusk, the sun fighting its setting, … [Read more...]
A special needs mom’s response to seeing it in writing
A special needs mom's response to seeing it in writing Yesterday I took my six-year-old daughter Evangeline to the dentist and came home sad. It was a new practice, so I had to fill out Evie's medical history. The beginning was easy: Name: Evangeline Marchenko Doctor's name, address, and phone number, immunizations up to date, reason for the appointment. Standard questions. … [Read more...]
Go with the strength you have …
Go with the strength you have ... It's happening again ... That horrible feeling that comes and goes as a special needs parent. Am I failing my kids? Should I be doing more? Could someone else parent my child better? I'm starting to feel like a failure. I just don't think I have enough strength for this parenting gig today. And then I remember I am reminded of a lesson God taught me through … [Read more...]
‘This belongs to’ … realizing who our special needs kids really belong to in a hospital cafeteria
'This belongs to' ... realizing who our special needs kids really belong to in a hospital cafeteria I sit in the hospital cafeteria, a half-eaten chicken sandwich and a bottle of water is positioned in front of me on the plastic tray that reminds me of grade school. My foot taps. A loud metronome sounds in my head. Tick, tick, tick, tick. I scoop up another bite of chocolate pudding with whipped … [Read more...]
To the New Mother of a Baby with Down syndrome
To the new mother of a baby with Down syndrome Meeting Her I remember the feeling. That first meeting with another family farther along the path of Down syndrome after the birth of our child with the same diagnosis. I remember fear and fascination. Fear of the child four or five years old who's eyes mirrored my baby's. She shouldn't have looked like him. I birthed her. She should have … [Read more...]