Do you ever wonder if you’re selling your kid short? Even though my son isn’t exactly a “kid” anymore—he’s 29-years-old—I sometimes tend to shortchange him when it comes to my expectations of his capabilities. It’s hard to tell with autism exactly what your child knows or doesn’t know. Especially when he or she doesn't have a lot of language. Even though Joel has moderate cognitive … [Read more...]
Am I a bad parent?
The hardest part for me about parenting a child with special needs is the insecurity. Insecurity. . . with professionals who seem to know so much more than I feel like I do with friends and family who secretly and not-so-secretly disagree on the reasons my adopted kids act the way they do. when I pick up the monthly slew of psychiatric meds at our pharmacy and fear what the 19 year … [Read more...]
What It Means To Be Independent
"She's never going to be independent." That's the fear I have, more often than I'd like, about my oldest daughter. Mostly it occurs to me when she's some combination of PMS/Bipolar and we have mornings like we did yesterday. Mornings when she's alternately weeping and giggling---in one breath accusing me of hating her and, in the next, begging me for pancakes. Here's what independent means … [Read more...]
Are You There God?
Often times when things are going good we don’t talk to God as much, but when things start to crumble we look to Him and often ask “why” or “how come.” My journey through life in my 46 years so far has had some ups, downs, curves, twists, turns, and sometimes sharp drops out of nowhere. I grew up primarily in a divorced home with 2 parents that were struggling in their own right. Before age … [Read more...]
When Our Own Health Is In Crisis
Unexpected. That's what I say when people ask how my summer's been. Not that I don't expect seasons to cycle and summer to come and go each year. It's just that I didn't expect to go in for a routine appointment with my own doctor and discover, after a half-dozen scans and tests, that I've got a fast-growing fibroid that may be malignant growing in my uterus. Or that I'd spend the past few … [Read more...]
when the waves are too strong
Humbling. If I had to choose a word to define parenting - especially parenting children with special needs - humbling would be it. None of us likes to be humbled. Humility is not the top faith trait I usually aim for. Wisdom, faithfulness, love, integrity, compassion, contentment... all of those are preferred over humility, if I'm honest about what I want. But as a woman sorting through … [Read more...]