Lessons from a Children's Hospital aren't lessons any of us really want to learn. They are the lessons best learned from textbooks rather than in the field. I wish that was the case here. No such luck. After Evan's most recent stay at the hospital I took from it some things that were more than just medical. It taught me a hospital stay is more than meets the eye. For us, an emergency trip to … [Read more...]
Don’t Shut Dad Out
We women are notorious for doing it... We complain that we need help, but then we are critical of our husbands when they lend a hand. Raise your hand if you've ever done it. I'm raising mine too! Mentoring other parents like myself over the years, I see this as a repeated issue between husbands and wives. Yet, I don't think mothers realize how much they shut their husbands out of the … [Read more...]
May Again: Memories of the Good, the Bad, and the Lovely
It’s May again, my favorite month. Filled with birthdays, spring flowers blooming, cornfields awash in new life, turning the countryside in our state a most delicious green. May is also my least favorite month. Filled with wrenching separations, fading lilac blossoms and tulip petals blowing in the wind, not to be seen for 12 more long months. May, for me, is a tangled mess of … [Read more...]
Bona Fide and Accepted In Christ
I often feel like I am constantly trying to win the approval and acceptance of others with the things of this world. I long for the same acceptance for my son but find us more on the outside than ever with our family's obvious differences. With or without special needs, there is only one place where we are truly 'Bona fide.' We are accepted in Christ. Bona fide! ... My husband recently became … [Read more...]
Hope for the Continual Cycle of Grief Special-Needs Parents Experience
I've been seeing a therapist for a few months. A therapist who specializes in grief. Last week she said I've graduated, but I'm not so sure I'm done grieving. I may never be done. But I have found hope. Special-needs parents experience unique grief. Instead of moving through the regular stages and finding resolution, we can be struck with grief at any moment. We go through the cycles again and … [Read more...]
What Is The Real Battle?
I have realized recently parenting children with special needs is like standing in the water at the beach with a major undertow. Growing up in southern California, we frequently took trips to the beach. The days when the undertow was strong, we had to be very careful. They can be dangerous if you are not paying attention. They love to sweep your legs out from underneath you. I have come to the … [Read more...]