Chronic pain. Parents of kids with special needs deal with it every single day. Not only our children's pain, which is what springs to mind for most moms and dads when the topic arises. But also our own chronic pain. We all experience it. Our pain can be caused by the physical demands of caregiving. It can be mental and emotional pain exacted by sleep deprivation, the trauma of seeing our … [Read more...]
Lost in Translation
A little more than a year ago, a friend took a few of my books to a special-needs family camp in Pelchi, Latvia. Partway through the week, she sent a text. "They love what you write about. Can you come next year to work with the moms?" "YES!" I immediately texted back. "Count me in." From that moment on, my resolve to attend remained firm. It was bolstered when the fundraiser organized by dear … [Read more...]
The Sad Truth about PTSD in Children
For the first 52 years of my life, I had no idea children could struggle with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). But in 2008 when my son, age 26, was diagnosed with this mental illness, I learned the truth. PTSD in children is real, and my son had been living with it for 26 years. His PTSD began when he had surgery less than a day after he was born. "He won't remember," the doctors told … [Read more...]
Will We Cling to God?
It's here again. The anniversary of the day my world turned upside down. The birthday of our firstborn. The day my heart swelled with a fierce, intense, permanent love. The day my heart broke. The day the doctor said, "There's something wrong with your baby." That day is here again. The anniversary of the decision my husband and I made 34 years ago. Would we cling to God when our newborn … [Read more...]
God Has a Reason for this New Life
My baby brother turns 57 today. He is my parents' third child. Mom was shocked, rather than thrilled, to hear she was pregnant in the fall of 1958. And for several good reasons. Her husband had been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis only a few months earlier. The progress of the disease meant he would soon give up his job. She had just signed a teaching contract to support her family. Then … [Read more...]
When All I Want Is to Be Done with Special Needs
One of the first words out of our oldest grandchild's mouth was, "DONE!" He used it emphatically at the end of meals... DONE! When having his face washed or his nose wiped... DONE! Or my personal favorite...approximately two seconds after his parents put him in his crib for a nap and then carefully and oh-so-quietly shut the door to his bedroom... DONE! Lately, I've found myself silently … [Read more...]