There are momma bears, and then there are MOMMA BEARS. Those of us who are raising a child with a chronic illness, disability, or special need tend to fall in the second category. While not necessarily qualifying as a “helicopter parent,” we do tend to stay a little more engaged than the average mom or dad, monitoring for anything serious in the way of medical, psychological, behavioral, or social … [Read more...]
Pick Your Battles: when losing doesn’t have to mean loss
Parenting experts have been known to quip the phrase “pick your battles.” In my experience as a special needs parent, however, the problem isn’t just about which battles to fight, but knowing when it’s okay to lose. Long ago I surrendered the battle with my autistic sons over a healthy diet in favor of settling for almost anything that would keep my picky, OCD eaters alive and breathing. … [Read more...]
Healing Prayers and Promises in Disability Parenting
I just finished reading a national bestseller on prayer that, frankly, was very hard to finish. What grieved me most was a story about a pastor who counseled a young couple of a child with autism. The pastor opened his Bible to a random page, read a random passage of scripture about Abraham’s offspring forever speaking God’s word, and then claimed it as a promise that this couple’s nonverbal child … [Read more...]
When There Is More Than One Diagnosis
Lightning can and does strike the same place twice. Ask me how I know. For too many years I subscribed to the delusional belief that if I endured some sort of remarkable challenge, I would be exempt from future struggles or trials. God has made it a life-long lesson to show me the error of my ways, and to reveal the incredible difference He can make with lives that are completely dependent upon … [Read more...]
When Life Is Not a Hallmark Card
It’s true. Misery loves company. And probably the reason one of my favorite shows is The Middle, a sitcom about the misadventures of a mid-western family not very unlike my own. Duct-taped appliances? Special needs teens and a seat-of-the-pants mother? Check. It’s a show that makes me laugh because the Hecks (or rather their script writers) “get it”. Life is a daily walk into the precarious … [Read more...]
Surviving the “Normal” Moments with Special Needs Tweens
I drove up to my daughter’s after school bus stop as the bus drove away. Not seeing her brunette hair as I looked down the street, my heart pounded. “Where is she?” I thought. It was the first day we'd planned for her to stay after school for math tutoring. For almost a month, we’d talked about her starting this week. We walked through the routine at school that morning---which classroom she’d … [Read more...]