As last Friday came around (September 11), I kept seeing posts about "never forget," missing loved ones who left us that September day 14 years ago. It really made me think about not forgetting where we came from, my son and I. I will never forget when he couldn't talk at all at even age 3. He couldn't tell us his basic needs. He would take my hand and bring it to the thing he wanted. … [Read more...]
Letting Special Needs Kids Grow Up
Parked at a crowded curb in front of the middle school, I watch as my girls get out of the van, tie shoes, check hair in the side window, glance to see if anyone they know is nearby. I should drive away, I think. I should leave and make space for another family to unload their kids. But it's not just the parking spot. It's the admission my girls are growing up. They walk away from the minivan. … [Read more...]
The Lovely Wreckers
My mother used to say, “I can’t have anything nice with kids in the house!” She didn’t so much say it as she did wail it. We were the kids who came swinging in through the kitchen window feet first from the eaves of the roof, or accidentally lit the garage on fire. The security system in the house was basically just a trigger mechanism for the neighbor’s rage. His first thought, I’m guessing, … [Read more...]
Preparing for the Test
In the midst of all we had going on with the newness of understanding we had a child with special needs: the emotions, the changes, the challenges, the sleepless nights, anger, worry, sadness, grief, joy, fun, tough times, hope for a healing, we heard something like this, “BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP. This is a test. This is a test of the emergency broadcast system. This is only a test. Had it been a … [Read more...]
I’ll Never Let Go
I remember holding him in my arms for the first time just minutes after cutting his cord in the delivery room. I would place his sleeping form on my chest, his head gently laying across my shoulder, as we sat in my chair at night. I would rest contentedly when, as an infant, he would curl up against me on the bed and nuzzle his head in the crook of my arm. I would hold him in my … [Read more...]
What Our Kids “CAN’T DO”
It’s so easy to talk about all the things our kids can do, are doing, and will do, but for those of us with children having special needs, one might be heard talking about the things our children “can’t” do. I tend to do that because often those are the things that concern me the most, and the things I most wish he “could” do. But recently I began to think (as I have thought on other occasions) … [Read more...]