She calls me what her brothers don’t. Because they are boys, most likely, or perhaps because they are impatient and "MOM!" hollered from somewhere else is easier to get out of their mouths. Loudly. Grace is walking up the stairs, calling my name before she reaches the top. But it’s not the “Mom!” of Noah’s tween insistence. It’s her calling, “Mama?” It is sweet and gentle. And it lasts only … [Read more...]
On Learning to Love
Read below for a guest post from Mary Tutterow. “We love because He first loved us.” - 1 John 4:19 Love can get so complicated. So much fear of giving love and losing a bit of ourselves if we get hurt. So much manipulation – I will love you so that you will love me. So much disappointment – You don’t love me enough. Our daughter, Mary Addison, is mentally and physically challenged and she has … [Read more...]
Will It Be All Right? (And What if You Aren’t Sure?)
I know you’re weary. I feel it, too. I feel it deep in my bones before my feet hit the floor in the still-dark hours of the early morning. I feel it... weariness. I'm so tired of a broken world full of darkness unspeakable. Tired of shoulders hunched from the heavy load of caring for family. My cheeks are red from the frustration of mothering a child with special needs and a teen struggling … [Read more...]
Tiger Moms and Docile Dads?
Partners in Care-giving It'd been a long day at the wood-shop--Darryl came in dusty, hat tossed on the back of his head. For me it'd been a long day on the home front--three different phone calls to the neurologist, medication adjustments plus the usual activity of five kids in one house. "What do think about the seizures?" I asked Darryl for his opinion. He shrugged and turned his … [Read more...]
For the Times When Others Don’t Get It
Dear special needs parent, Some people will never get what it is like to walk in our shoes. No matter how many times we try to explain our situation, our child, the challenges our family has to face—no matter how many details we share—the reality is that most people won’t get it. And some people might think we are exaggerating, or that we are not doing enough, and we might feel judged by their … [Read more...]
Look Around!
"Call me if you need anything." It is an incredibly frustrating, well-meaning phrase that we parents of complex kids hear all too often. Yet, we rarely do pick up that phone to call. Sometimes it is because it just feels too awkward. Other times, we're afraid of hearing "no." But there can be another reason that we don't call, besides feeling humiliated. Speaking with numerous special … [Read more...]