Letting go of self-sabotage on the special needs journey It took my daughter Polly, who was born with Down syndrome, a long time to walk. When she was around two and a half years old, her physical therapist loaned us a stander; this wooden contraption that looked like it may have been used for torture at some point in the past, designed to strap kids in while standing upright to build muscle … [Read more...]
Advice on How to Encourage Special-Needs Siblings (from a Special-Needs Sibling)
"She ruins everything!" I said to my mom when I was six and my big sister bumped into an art project I'd been working on all day. And again when I was twelve and she wanted to hang out with me and my friends at my slumber party. And again when I was seventeen and she snuck upstairs when I was watching a movie with a boyfriend. And again when I was twenty-two, as I walked behind her down a … [Read more...]
Where’s my IEP?
Tomorrow morning I will attend yet another IEP (Individualized Education Plan) meeting for my daughter who has Down syndrome. I'll never forget the first one. She was just three years old. I remember worrying about an 'us against them' attitude between the professionals and my husband and me. I was afraid my voice wouldn't be heard. I was afraid I didn't even know what to say. Our family has … [Read more...]
When Life Is Not a Hallmark Card
It’s true. Misery loves company. And probably the reason one of my favorite shows is The Middle, a sitcom about the misadventures of a mid-western family not very unlike my own. Duct-taped appliances? Special needs teens and a seat-of-the-pants mother? Check. It’s a show that makes me laugh because the Hecks (or rather their script writers) “get it”. Life is a daily walk into the precarious … [Read more...]
She stands tall; not trying to fix the child I adopted
She stands tall; not trying to fix the child I adopted When we adopted Evangeline from Ukraine in 2009, she hunched. She cowered. She chose to spend her time hidden in little pockets of the house, behind the sofa, under the comforter on her bed. How would I bring her out of her shell? How would I get her to not only make eye contact with me, but to trust me and let love in after two … [Read more...]
Who Do You Say You Are?
Each day, we have choices to make. One choice—one that you make each day—can drastically affect your life in astounding ways. Choose one option and you will live an abundant life unshaken by the circumstances around you. Choose the other option and you will live a reactive life, unstable and swayed by the opinions of others. The question we face each day is this: Who do you say you are? Are … [Read more...]