If there's one thing I've learned from special needs ... pray. Pray. Before everything else. Pray. When I'm overwhelmed and in the midst of the chaos. Pray. When there's nothing else. Pray. With my eldest I can remember two distinct times of prayer when he was a baby. Two times. Two times I cried out to God in need in those early years. I'm sure I prayed, but life was just easier with a … [Read more...]
When Chronic Pain Makes Us Doubt God’s Promises
Chronic pain. Parents of kids with special needs deal with it every single day. Not only our children's pain, which is what springs to mind for most moms and dads when the topic arises. But also our own chronic pain. We all experience it. Our pain can be caused by the physical demands of caregiving. It can be mental and emotional pain exacted by sleep deprivation, the trauma of seeing our … [Read more...]
More Than I Can Handle
Sometimes, as an attempt to comfort your heart as you are struggling through a new diagnosis, or even years afterward, friends or family might offer consolation by saying something along the lines of, “God chose to give you a child with autism because He knew you were strong enough”, or one of my personal favorites, “He will never give you any more than you can handle”, or even the Biblical … [Read more...]
“Fear Is a Lie From the Pit of Hell”
Those words were so unexpected that they knocked me off my feet. And, yet, I knew exactly what he meant. Without hesitation, I wrote them into my iPhone. I didn’t want to forget what Joel Houston, leader of the Christian band Hillsong UNITED, had just said. In sharing stories over the years with many, many parents of children with a disability, I’ve learned that fear is the one thing that holds … [Read more...]
Will We Cling to God?
It's here again. The anniversary of the day my world turned upside down. The birthday of our firstborn. The day my heart swelled with a fierce, intense, permanent love. The day my heart broke. The day the doctor said, "There's something wrong with your baby." That day is here again. The anniversary of the decision my husband and I made 34 years ago. Would we cling to God when our newborn … [Read more...]
Mother’s Day — It’s Complicated
I sat in the folding chair at my kid's school today, grinning at my son and daughter up on the stage. It was the annual Mother's Day program and my heart overflowed watching them—my son staring at me unwaveringly and my daughter sneaking shy glances my way. Next to me my other son, Calvin, sat in his wheelchair, listening to the kid's voices fill the gym. He grinned his signature side-smile at … [Read more...]