Children on the autism spectrum usually fall in one of two camps when it comes to their feelings about crowds: crowds are either an audience or a plague. For Jesse, crowds are an audience. He loves to mug, and show off, and recite what he knows about things of no interest to the listener. For Noah, crowds are a plague. This makes it a challenge to plan a wedding when both boys are also a part … [Read more...]
When the Disability’s Not So “Bad”
I feel guilty about a very strange thing. Not about something I’ve done, but about something I was given. Today, I want to hold my hand up and shield people from paying attention to this part of my life; here, in this particular community of parents who struggle daily with special needs, and never-ending vigilance. A few codes in our neurologist’s office indicate I’ve every right to be among you … [Read more...]
Please stop telling me to take care of myself (+10 Ways to Help a SN Parent)
I get it. When you stop for a moment and say, “Take care of yourself, OK?” you’re telling me you care. And I’m so glad you stopped instead of walking by. But can I let you in on something? I’m trying to take care of myself, really I am. On days where my son’s health is decently stable I think I actually do. I exercise, cook meals, do laundry, pick up kids and even sneak in an extra long … [Read more...]
When Our Children with Disabilities Rise to the Occasion
(For Dana) T.S. Eliot wrote that April is the “cruellest month.” Not for me. I find it’s barren February, with its unkind cold, and in which month I have known too many men of character who have died recently, and long past. At 6’7” with a perpetual mustache, bright blue eyes, and a voice like a thunderclap, Boyd Salsbury cut an imposing profile. His demeanor was gruff, his words carefully … [Read more...]
Picture This
When something heartbreaking happens in our life we may start to experience some shame. Especially if we thought we could have done something to prevent it from happening. Whether you are a new special needs parent or you’ve been on the journey a while shame always loves to come knocking. The enemy loves to build a wall of shame and put our pictures on it. Every time we see that wall, he wants to … [Read more...]
Protect Our Children, Lord
Do you have fears for your children? What do you worry about or think about daily? Is there something more on your mind that bothers you about the future of your child? *Mature material included in this blog I have a confessional. One of the things I think about the most and have the most thoughts about is protecting my son Charlie. I mean protecting Charlie from others who want to take … [Read more...]